Sunday, January 15, 2012

my christmas



Yeah, that time of year when you get to over indulge in food, spend quality time with family and buying expensive gifts that you rather have not. when we get to pretend that we care about each other yet we spent the better part of the year disjointed. Anyway, Christmas is not the same as it used to be; maybe I have outgrown the joy and happiness that came with the season. Oh, it used to be so much fun, not anymore.

So I am just sited in my favorite chair, thinking of Santa and his deer, of how they may be stuck in Antarctica due to the rising fuel prices or trapped in Las Vegas where he gambled away all the gifts for all the little children. Maybe he is wandering the streets of Nairobi as a homeless hobo after being swindled of all his possessions-except that ridiculous hat by our very own sisters. I mean, seriously that thing looks hideous. With the numerous no flying zones all over the globe today, i doubt he ever took off.

So Santa is a big fat loser and a pathetic attention-seeking twit because, he just comes around only once a year. What is the point of making a kid happy only once in 366 days when you can do it every day? Nobody really cares or even thinks about you on June or any other day of the year except December. We just love you because of the promise of ‘free gifts’ and reduced rates on booze. Yeah, I hate to break it to you, nobody really loves you Santa, sorry.

Speaking of gifts, maybe this year Santa should trade them for clothes, food and drugs for the poor people in refugee camps and shelters who really need them. No more cookies and milk next to the chimney for you old man, you should keep your weight in check this year. Children may start thinking being obese is cool. Please don’t behave like a big bearded baby that you are, throwing tantrums over free food.

This year, I’m ‘trying’ to be good and so is Santa I hope. Oh yeah, that’s right I am turning over the proverbial new leaf. I never got any presents last Christmas, so presumably I have been a bad boy which I highly doubt. Santa can back me up on this one if only he knew the exact location to my house because he has NEVER EVER dropped in since FOREVER. So who is the bad boy now?